The Love Journey of Lakshmi
‘Let me be your lover’, was appropriate to think.
And I felt it.
So, then I didn’t understand that at one point he came in with her.
His wife now and mother of his child.
I don’t know if he will have more with her.
But ok, I didn’t speak to him for a few months when they came in together.
I understand things can happen.
However, I was surprised.
Nonetheless.
However, the side note I want to make.
The older we get, the more experienced we are getting.
The more experiences we are having.
The good and ugly ones.
The ones we like to forget and perhaps hold some shame around.
But the truth is, with experience comes a package.
Something we can call age even.
Perhaps that is the reason why.
Why we are not able to find love at an older age.
In memory of Nikola Tesla.
I believe for those geniuses out there.
The highly intelligent, sensitives and spiritual ones.
Just a few examples I am naming.
And you can fill in for yourself if this is something you feel called to.
At least all of them that are not easily put in the box of the ordinary.
Something I consider myself.
I believe this lack that we can fill is what our predecessors lived and where we can build further on.
In the meaning when it comes to intelligence, sensitivity, perhaps even time and energy.
To learn those lessons, accomplishing what these predecessors couldn’t or didn’t do.
For no specific reason.
I find it weird to write about it.
And I didn’t even start yet.
I needed a minute to think about, if this was really something I wanted to write about at all.
That minute became a day, or two.
Perhaps even three.
At least it wasn’t that long ago.
And here I am.
Something is happening.
And I find it hard to express.
I have been on this road before and I have said things then also.
Is this a mindfuck of what I am thinking?
I can see my thoughts and everything that comes with it.
However, nothing really happens.
I think that is for the better.
And then my life continues again.
But most of all, an interest brings you closer to yourself.
Where the good remains, for people to see who you truly are.
A story about not fitting in, is something I felt appropiate to write.
Because we all do, sometimes.
Or somehow.
The reason this came to my mind, was due something I experienced.
And that is all that I am going to say about it.
The question is not if I fitted in just there.
I just didn’t.
That is the truth about that.
I was trying to be someone, to be part of a crowd.
Many reasons I can give for that.
But what is somehow unknown, is what it does underneath the surface.
But when it comes to identity there is so much more.
That we don’t know of, or just not aware of.
It could be both.
It is even the things we wear, the place we stay, the products we use.
To form us from the inside.
And to continue, this can even have an effect on the partner for life we finally choose.
If cultural identity is a start for that.
Perhaps it is a bit bolt to say.
However that it has an impact on us as such.
There is no doubt about it, for sure.
It would be built up from inside out.
With saying this, I mean to say that the eye also wants something.
Ugly, wouldn’t suit me, just because I am not that.
A bright mind would help also.
But most important is that feeling of protection and safety.
To say, you don’t have to be a prince to receive such a kiss.
And that to me sounds like a journey of love.
To come back at that realization I was having.
After giving that kiss.
I am no princess and I can not turn someone into a prince.
Change him into someone he is not, let me say it like this.